update!

First, thanks to those of you who stopped by. It means a lot to me to know that there are people out there with positive thoughts for us.

So..... After getting about one hour of sleep last night, I got up this morning to stare at the telephone until the social worker called. She called around 11:30. I told her how we felt - which is completely comfortable and happy with this situation and that we fully committed to proceeding. It seems that this mother (I'll call her K) was especially interested in us and hadn't really wanted to contact other families. With our agency, usually a mother will choose 3 or 4 families from the profile book, in case some of the families decide not to go forward with the situation. And then the mother will choose the one to meet. For this phone call with our social worker I was expecting that after I told her that we were super excited, she basically asked if we could come in on Thursday to meet K. They had already set a time and day to meet and were just waiting to see what we said! Whoa...........

Our social worker gave us some more information about K, including some of her physical traits, her interests, her family support system, why she showed interest in us, etc....

I have some issues with saying that an adoption is "meant to be". I believe that adoption is full of fundamental losses (on all parts) and there is part of me that feels like I am belittling someone else's loss by saying it's meant to be. Not sure if I'm explaining myself well here. Does this make sense? I mean - how can I chalk something off as "meant to be" that has signified such a painful and difficult time in some one's life while at the same time it has such a tremendously positive meaning for us?

Ok, so having said that, there are many things about this relationship that we are about to embark on (whether K ultimately decides to place with us or not) that feels so absolutely right. I'm pretty sure I just contradicted myself here, but that's how I'm feeling now, so there it is!

So Thursday at 3:30 p.m. we will meet with K, along with both of our social workers. I asked our social worker, "So what will happen at this meeting other than lots of tears??!!". We have a general plan of things we want to say/share/ask. Phew. Our social worker suspects that K will want to move forward right away and may even sign that afternoon. So if she does indeed decide to choose us, we may take little baby girl home early next week. Yowza.

Tomorrow I plan to make a CD of music for K (she loves music and is a singer!), clean the house, freak out some more, probably say "oh my god" over and over, and continue to contemplate the reality that this is happening to us right now!

Thanks again for stopping by, and I'll be back with more updates as they happen.